Sunday, July 13, 2008

Here we go again...

So the other day I got in my car and went to my friendly neighborhood Wal-Mart in order to exchange some cash monies for physical supplies, and guess what I found when I got back out to the parking lot. No really, go ahead and guess. Did you guess a dent in the hood the size of a small dinner plate? Well you are correct!
Somebody jumped on my car! There were a couple of slightly dusty footprints, and that is how I know how my car happened to have its hood molested!
Somebody jumped on my car! How can you jump on somebody's car unintentionally? The answer: You can't! Jumping on something as big as a Toyota Corolla is, as a general rule, a premeditated action. Who says to themselves, "I believe that I will leap upon the bonnet of this automobile that is not under my ownership."?
There is a slight chance that whoever did it did not realize that they caused damage, but I imagine it probably went more like this:
"Ah f**k dude! You dented it! Hahaha! Nobody saw so let's get inside and get that Blue Moon and Cheez Whiz that we came here for!"

Human Race, I have a serious problem with you! Consider yourself on notice!

5 comments:

Unknown said...

Maybe your vehicle was involved in a foot chase. The cops were pursuing a criminal and in his attempt to escape he ran across the hoods of various vehicles. It still doesn't make it right, but it gives a decent story. Be imaginative with it and you will have the best cocktail story ever.

Anonymous said...

ok, now bun, you know it was not me this time 'cause i am here and you are there. am wondering if some one hang-glide landed upon the hood, any shreds of canvas about the antenea?
where parked under a light pole that was being used as a bungee jumping take-off?
mom

Anonymous said...

In America, you(r car) runs over pedestrian. In Soviet Russia, pedestrian runs over you(r car)!

luckeyfrog said...

Actually there were just some kids playing frisbee with a padded iron frisbee and it hit your car.

Oh, wait, uh, I don't know that...

Anonymous said...

You sound so like my daughter, now only if those rants could get out to the right people - they would maybe learn to use that head between their ears for something besides denting your car!