Thursday, November 30, 2006

Hark, the call to arms...

As some of you may know, tomorrow I will be hosting my first ever SoF practice. I'm excited. And nervous. This much excited and this much nervous. I'll probably be this much nervous by about 4:00 tomorrow.
Being the stickler for preparedness that I am (though I was never a boy scout I do try to help the occasional old lady across the street regardless) I've got my games list all worked out. We'll be doing the first ever (audience present) performance of Inner Voices! Every time we've practiced it it's gone fantastically well so I can't wait to see how the audience reacts to it.

In other news, tension mounts as the First Annual (I hope :) Ship of Fools Gift Exchange (or FASoFGE) draws near. The Rex claims to have figured out pretty much who drew who's name, with the exception of a couple, including mine. Seeing the group of people that they're coming from, both incredibly creative, smart, funny and extremely diverse in their interests, I would expect the gift choices to be very interesting at the least!

FASoFGE Countdown: 5 days 22 hours 49 minutes

And you thought Christmas was a big deal.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

We now return you to...

...your regularly scheduled programming.

Some of you may know that at times I am a Reluctant Insomniac. Reluctant to the extent that, unlike Benji, I love my sleep. With the passion of an addict. More importantly I love feeling rested.

Thus when I can't sleep I usually revert to either reading or writing. Often the writing involves this blog. Goodness knows you all have played victim to many an ill-written post spawned from my sleep deprived mind.

That having been said, it was a bit of an irritation when on the Tuesday of Thanksgiving break I found myself lying there unable to shut off my mind. And no computer...
But alas, being the kind of person I am (undaunted by sitting outside at 1 in the morning in my nightgown), I put on shoes, two coats, grabbed the bedspread and headed out-of-doors.
Let me tell you, it was an absolutely gorgeous night. Cold, but gorgeous. Funny how easy it is to forget some things. After living my entire life in that same place it was still something of a surprise to see just how many stars were visible. And as far as visibility goes, it was pretty good, but not remarkable by any stretch. Here you can see like 4 stars...on a good night.
I stayed out for quite some time, laying on the trunk of my car (that's actually quite comfortable for stargazing.) Even saw a couple of tiny, leftover Leonid meteors. Orion rising in the east, the Big Dipper setting in the north.

Some people say that they look at the sky and feel tiny or insignificant. I don't. I don't think it's ever made me feel that way. It's spectacular and amazing and enormous and impossible to wrap your mind around yes, but it's still packed full of possibilities and mysteries and new things and, as cliched as this sounds, untouched frontiers waiting to be explored.

To wrap things up, I really don't think that there is any better time or place to reconcile yourself with whatever might be consuming your mind then when you're completely hidden in darkness, looking out over the whole of the universe.
It's glorious, that's what it is.

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Did you know the first...

...reader of this post will mark the 1000 hit on my blog? Yup. They will.
I have a Thanksgiving Break Report Post in the making, but for this pseudo anniversary or whatever the heck you'd call it I think I'd like something else. A bit of writing mayhaps? I really don' t have much in the making, but I'll give you the first thing that came to hand. Except for the very first line I don't think it's all that great, but it's what I have so here it is.

~ "Don't just stand there goggling at me like some giant stupid fish! What is it?" Snarled Jared at the young sergeant.
"Sir, the reports you asked for are ready sir."
Asked for was certainly putting a nice spin on it.
Jared stared at the kid for a minute. "Well then can you give them to me already?"
"Oh! Yes sir, I'm sorry sir." Stammered the boy, simultaneously turning a lovely shade of pink and finally remembering to extend his arm.
"Thank you!", snapped Jared, snatching the file from the lad's hand. "That will be all."
As the sergeant left the room at a pace that was meant to look business like, but actually appeared more like a panicked escape, Sam heard Jared muttering something about "darn kids" and "just out of ROTC".

Monday, November 20, 2006

Everyone has their secrets I suppose...

So I was talking to a friend the other day about keeping a journal. Well actually it started with the discussion of journals in general. As he put it, and as I have always felt, there's something about a nice journal that is just majestic. There's so much potential there. The art of the written word, and I don't just mean the finished product of a book or a letter, I mean writing, the written language, is purely elegant. Naturally it's use in the conveyance of ideas is impressive, but I've always found the act of writing somehow intriguing.
But that's not really what I meant to talk about tonight. I was going to talk about my own peculiar journal keeping enigmas.
Traditionally my journals contain a very high percentage of random scenes. I find the potential of a good journal and a well-writing pen inspiring.
They also have a lot of dreams recorded in them as well though. I'm not a believer of dream interpretation, but mine are impressively strange at times and also serve as inspiration (even direct transcription a couple of times) for scenes or stories.
And then there's the personal stuff. Things I want to remember forever, and things that I'm thinking or feeling that I just want to write down. This blog also serves that purpose, but I'd say that my journal entries are somewhat darker. That is the place for things that I don't necessarily want the rest of the world to be reading (not just yet at any rate).
Today I surpassed even those bounds. I wrote something in it this morning, concerning a dream I had last night. Tonight when I couldn't sleep I picked up the journal to try and write for a while.
I felt as if that previous entry was adulterating the pages.
Simple act to take it out, tear it up and throw it away right? No. There was a reason I wrote it in there. The same reason I'm writing about it here. To talk about it. And possibly even to have a record of it. I did tear it out. But I folded it up and sealed it in an envelope. I'll probably throw it way, or burn it. I don't know.
I just thought it was funny that there are some things that I talk about openly which jive with the things that I write about on this blog, which slightly jive with the things that I write in my journal. And then there are the things that I don't even want on the pages of that.
I don't know that I will even post this entry. If I do, know that it is unedited and that I did it on a whim. For now I'm just going to save it.
Everyone has their secrets I suppose...

Saturday, November 18, 2006

This round's on me...

Nearly 2 AM: Coming down off the high of a great show followed by a rousing round of 1000 Blank White Cards. Being serenaded by Sinatras' "Somethin' Stupid". As the adrenalin wash wears off I'm left with a deliciously sleepy feeling, though I very much doubt that I could go to sleep just yet.

Twas a good night, a very good night. Even though my arm feels about 15 pounds heavier. Funny thing that. Gather round, I'll tell ya the story.

So one of the 10^3 BWC cards had everyone raise an arm, elbow locked. Whoever was the last to drop their arm won something...I think. I can't remember now. I was actually pleased and a bit surprised about how long I was sticking it out. And that's when Cowboy made his mistake, saying something along the lines of, "I want to quit but I can't lose to a girl!". Some of you may know that I do have a competitive streak, and I took that as a definite challenge. A few minutes later that card was rendered null and void by a different one, but Benji, Cowboy and myself kept it up cause we're crazy like that. I don't know how long we stayed like that but it was a long long time.
The point where my biceps and triceps were trembling uncontrollably had come and gone. Eventually apparently Cowboy decided that his arm was more important then his pride and dropped out. It was down to me and Benji. I really had no qualms about losing to Benji, no standing challenge there, but I decided to go for the win.
I think my favorite part of the deal was all the people asking at various stages, "Isn't your arm tired?" or "How can your arm not be tired?". Let me tell you. Tired is not the word.
In the end I lasted out Benji as well. At that point the game was ending. We did make some jokes about my driving a few people home with my arm out the window, but that turned out to be unnecessary.
So now, even though I do still have full range of motion, my shoulder/upper arm does feel strange. Heavy and dead as well as very slightly achey and very aware of the fact that there is blood flowing there. Tis interesting to say the least.
I condone it. I never thought I'd do good in a competition like that because I don't like pain very much, but you might just surprise yourself.
I do wish now that I had thought to time it...But alas, such is life.

The moral of the story children, talent may get you far, but sheer stupidity/stubbornness can do a lot as well!

Until next time, when hopefully I will be slightly more awake and have a better story to tell,
~Kamikaze, signing off.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

The past has shown...

...that most of my completely pointless updates are reserved for nights when I can't sleep.
I'm shaking things up this evening! The is a completely pointless post, but not because I can't sleep. Heavens no, I am in fact quite tired. But I'm writing this because I want to write something now, and come hell or high water I'm going to!
So today I stumbled across a swell mechanical pencil. Literally. I was walking to CGT lab this morning in the poring rain and went to step up on a curb and sent this pencil skittering across the pavement. In that kind of situation I'm never really sure what to do. I mean, the chances of the owner knowing where to look and actually finding it are extremely slim (had I left it there). In this case (seeing as how it was a pencil and not, oh say, a child) I kept it.
The funny thing is that I had it out in CGT, having told the story to Brian, and our TA comes around to grade our CAD assignments. I'm sitting there placidly listening to something he had to say about F-16's and radar and I suddenly come to the realization that (to my horror) I am about to place the end of the pencil (yes that's right folks, the pencil I found on the curb) into my mouth, as is my wont with my own collection of fine writing utensils.
You're all hearing it right? "Don't put that in your mouth! You don't know where it's been!"

In other news, on Wednesday the SoF all drew names for our Hidden Hanukkah Handout Happening (like Secret Santa, but Jewish). I can't say who I drew, but I will say that I already have his (ok, so you know it's not Kyle) present on the way and I think he'll be very happy with it. At least I hope so. And I'm pretty certain.
I'm also going to be hosting my first Friday practice on the 1st of December! At least as far as I know I will. Now we'll get to see just how much I've learned about timing and show planning!

To cauterize: Some quotes from our new game Inner Voices.

Attempt: First ever (and a resounding success might I add!)
Situation: Job interview

Ryan: "Do you have any salary demands?"
Benji's inner voice (Tripod): "Oh, I could make some demands!"
Ryan's inner voice (Stu): "I think you're de-mand."

So I realize that I'm not there yet, but I kinda like this moving towards being a cewebrity thing I've got goin' on. Check this out:*Log(Jamie)/082BBDC3-3485-4B4D-B329-11F7FCE15ECE.html
This particular website is written and published by Comrade Jamie.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Breaker, breaker, seven one niner alpha november...

I found this picture on the internet. Though I don't always find the fantasy genre to my taste, I thought it rather intriguing.
It's called "Night Angel" by fromtheshadowsart. A link can be found to this picture on the site Do you see the earth in the background? Isn't that neat?

Brings to mind the passage:

"Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light;
I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night."

From Sarah Williams: "Old Astronomer to His Pupil"

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Long awaited...

~ "You may regret that one of these days!"
"I may regret a lot of things when the time comes, but that time hasn't come- Get back!" Jared hissed suddenly, throwing his arm across Sam's chest and veritably flinging him back against the wall.
Two of the Council guards made their way past, conversing amicably in a dialect that Sam didn't recognize but apparently (judging from the considerable interest suddenly showing on his face) Jared had a working knowledge of.
In a second he was changed from his usual surly countenance to grinning like a madman. He waited only long enough for the two men to make it around the corner in the direction of the Council House before gloating, "Well what do you know! The Minister seems to have been out sick for a couple of days. Isn't that handy?"
Jared smirked and Sam found himself fearing for either his life or sanity once again.
"Jared, we can't just walk into the Minister's office."
"Oh yes we can. And we will. And be quiet about it! This isn't a Bond movie you know."
Those who knew Sam well agreed that he had considerable will power. And it took every last shred of it to restrain him from hitting Jared at that moment. The impulse died a sudden death when Jared, a dangerous glint still in his eye, shoved out of their little niche and started down the alley with the nonchalance of a tourist.
Sam made a spluttering noise that sounded ridiculous even to his own ears, but got no reaction. He finally just snatched up his pack, determining to fight that battle later, and caught up with Jared just as he was turning down another alley.
"Good grief Jared, was it really necessary to throw me at the wall?" Sam complained, rubbing the back of his neck. "You knocked the wind right out of me!"
"All the better. I didn't need those guys hearing you breathe."
Once again in a span of two minutes Sam wanted to lay into Jared. He reminded himself to take deep breaths as Jared took another corner into a crowded
The air was thick with the odors of camels, dust, sweat, decaying fish, and a mixture of spices and heavy incenses that assaulted the nose unmercifully.
Sam supposed that some of the smells, taken by themselves and in small doses, might even be pleasant. But not most of them.
Jared paused by a young boy with a reed basket and spent five full minutes bartering for two oranges and a handful of almonds. The child drove a stiff bargain and finally Jared acquiesced, paying full price, handing one of the oranges to Sam and slipping the little bag of almonds into his pocket.
Same didn't complain, it was past noon. Having had what Jared called a "good breakfast" (the ritual three tiny cups of ridiculously strong coffee and a piece of flat bread wrapped around cold rice and mutton, remnants of last nights supper which, incidentally, hadn't gotten less tough or better tasting overnight) he figured that it was high time for lunch.
~I made this!

I'd like to call attention to the fact that today is Veterans Day, and I want to say thank you. Thank you very much.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

The transit-ional period...

Today (or yesterday truth be told, seeing as it's after midnight) my grandfather sent me a link to an article about the upcoming Mercury transit. I kid you not, I spent a full five minutes trying to figure out how the living heck that was possible. It just didn't make a bit of sense. The geometry is all wrong! Mercury can't come between the Earth and Sun!
After a bit of this kind of logic and even a bit of surfing for more info I finally realized that it's a Mercury transit.
Now I can here you saying to yourself, "Yeah, Mercury, you said that. What's the point?"
Well, my friend, the point is that in my little planetary diagram buried deep within the synapses of my little brain I had juxtaposed...wait for it...Mars with Mercury. Yes indeed. Not consciously. I did not actually sit there and think to myself, "Mercury is farther from the sun then Earth." But I apparently stopped reading at the "M". Do I do that often? I don't think so...
Funny moment when I finally realized that, oh gee whiz, there can conceivably be a Mercury transit's Mercury!
And that, boys and girls, was Renee's Genius Monday Moment.
Thanks a lot folks, I'll be here all week!

Worth checking out, at the very least because I've been blamed for something on it and/or it's got a great name! And it's published by my friend Kara. ;)

Monday, November 06, 2006

A bit of dream journaling... what I feel up to right now.

So this morning I woke up from a rather...interesting dream. I have often said that I almost never have nightmares. Occasionally I'll have disturbing dreams, and I'd call this one slightly disturbing. I did want to go back to sleep and see how it turned out though. Even my disturbing dreams I find rather fascinating. Part of the reason being that I get to experience things that I wouldn't be able to otherwise.

This particular dream began with my being on (as near as I can figure) an 1800's war ship. Now I must have been either a prisoner or an impressed crewman, because I definitely wasn't fighting on their side. One of the funny things about it is that through the entire dream I believe I played a female role. It would seem that of all my dreams where I'm a man this should have been one of them. I mean really, on a navy ship in the 1800's?
Anyway, I ended up accused of being a traitor. And I didn't deny it. By their definition I certainly was one. I mean heck, I was sabotaging the ship. There was a bit of a pseudo trial and I was sentenced by the captain to walk the plank. At some point during this part of the dream the captain started (or perhaps had always been?) morphing into my father (hehe, what's that tell ya Freud?), and the ship into our home. But I was still supposed to be killed, yes, at home, via walking the plank.
I didn't fight the sentence, simply set about getting my affairs in order. I know that I hoped that there was some way out, but in the mean time you might as well prepare for the worst. The most vivid part of this portion of the dream was when I decided that my mom (who was exhibiting sorrowful resignation funnily enough) should give my tennis shoes (and supposedly whatever else I had) to somebody that needed them. I would walk the plank in my leather moccasin slippers. (Looking back I'm not really sure why I couldn't walk the plank barefoot, dignity mayhaps?) I then went outside to fill up Tiger's water trough and apparently say goodbye to him. I felt bad because the trough was empty and I thought he'd probably been thirsty.
My first impression upon waking? Relief that it was just a dream. No, not because I didn't in fact die, but relief that it was just a dream that Tiger didn't have water.
Second impression, a wish to go back to sleep to see what happened.
I thought that throughout the dream I acted very much as a spy/prisoner/sabotager (is that a word?) should. I had no choice but to be on the ship, and I made the best of the opportunity by gosh. I also faced my inevitable fate with an icy calm and dignified composure.

That's why I like my dreams! It's just like watching a movie, except that you're in it and you feel everything.
And just like an actor, in my dreams I usually don't see things from the perspective of "Renee". More often then not I am someone else, quite often a man, as I referenced before.
That's quality entertainment!

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Another shot at this...

Ok, I was at work and I wrote an uber big long post and saved it...twice! And now it's gone! Completely wiped off the face of the World Wide Web. Ggggrrrrrrr, Blogger!
It occurred to me that perhaps saving it redundantly actually negated it....

First off, a gigantic welcome to Peace and Talbert who were press ganged- eherm, I mean invited, into the Fools Fold last night. Congratulations guys!!!
Hehe, you know what this means right? I'm not the newest newbie anymore. Not that Cowboy will care.

So I was contemplating the flow of time and a friend of mine that is depressed about turning 23. To me 23 is nothing, but he feels like life is rushing past him, like he hasn't accomplished anything.
I kind of know what he means. There are so very many things that I want to experience but I only have a limited amount of time you know. I find myself simultaneously wanting time to speed up and slow down.
I want it to speed up because this semester my courses are trying to rip out my still beating heart and stand holding it over my limp shuddering body, laughing maniacally as my nonexistent GPA steals the last breath of life from my weakly convulsing lungs.
And next semester is going to be worse.
I want it to slow down because I want to savor every single second I have with my friends here. It's funny, and I'm not sure how or when it happened, but I feel closer now to the guys in the SoF and the C-crowd as Jamie calls it then I have to anybody in a long time. Possibly closer then I have to anybody ever. Not counting family of course, just friends.
The day I moved up here last semester my grandfather told me, "I'll bet that you will meet somebody here that you will be friends with for the rest of your life." I believed him then. Now I can say with complete conviction that that's true. I think it's already happened. And I got more then one out of the deal, and that's just awesome.
Also, according to Benji, the SoF can get you women. And it's true! I can name at least three people that count towards your traditional "girlfriends", or "gal pals" if you will. That's really something new for me. It's not that I don't like women, I have just always had exponentially more men/boys as friends. Why is that? I don't know.

They say that your college years are supposed to be the best of your life. I will naturally always try to one-up that. (After all, why limit yourself? The ceiling is where you build it.) But the SoF and those associated have, and will continue, to make topping this a really tough job for me.

I am happy that one cold January morning so very very long ago I happened to look down at the sidewalk and saw a poster...

"Need a hug? Ship of Fools: Improv comedy..."

Thursday, November 02, 2006

So this is my...

...first post of November, and it also marks the 9th month of this blog's existence. You see, if I had gotten pregnant instead of making a blog, I would have something to show for it by now. Not that I would condone such a thing. Goodness no. Not for all the space tourists in Russia. Which brings me to the point:
Why is it all the smart people that choose not to reproduce, and the stupid people that breed like rabbits? Is there something wrong with that picture? But moving beyond that:
The Hawkins show last night! I think it went fantastically well. We had a good sized audience (the room was crowded, not that gigantic of a room, but it was crowded) (kinda quite crowd at that), the regulars were there, free pizza was there. All in all, a winning combination. I invoked Happy Feet in Benji by giving him one of the fliers from our floor that advertised us as the "Ship of fool improve comedy club". I think that we do improve comedy.
So today at work I got a windfall in the form of 19 Science journals. We had a bunch that were donated that needed to go to recycling and it happened to be my job to mark them. Naturally I started getting interested in the pretty pictures on the fronts. So I was all like, "Yo homes, can I take some of these?" And they were all like, "Fo shizzle my nizzle." So I did.
Technically I got them to bring home to Shiloh. But I'm going to read them first.

~ If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not the sport for you! ~

Ok, so looking back on it I realize that my comment on "stupid people" was at the least cynical and at the worst (dare I say it) downright rude. I really don't have room to talk...I mean, my own father isn't exactly what you'd call genius material, and yet here I am. And I'm happy of my existence. When I say stupid people I mean more the people that are jerks and that you wouldn't want to leave a dog with, let alone let them raise the future leaders of America. That's still pretty rude, but what I'm trying to say is: I do lots of stupid things. I do lots of idiotic things. I do lots of colossally moronic things. But I do try not to be a jerk.